Do you ever look at another person, and think “I want to look like you. I want to have your long legs, your big eyes and bright smile”? I know I have dreamed myself away in somebody else’s life. Honestly, this is such a shame, because we all have so much potential to be great in our own unic way.I want to tell you a personal story, so we can get to know each other a little better. As a teenager, I had this idea that I would be happy, when my hair was down to my bellybutton. I would grow my hair for years, always searching for that feeling I thought it would give me, which was confidence and happiness. One day I looked in the mirror, saw that my hair WAS down tomy bellybutton, but I still felt empty inside. So I went to the hairdresser, and chopped it all off. This is when I realized that my hair had nothing to do with my confidence and that long hair wouldn’t make me happy. But then, what would make me happy?I went on a journey to find happiness right in this moment, and this is what i found out.
- Complement yourself everyday. Yup, you heard me, EVERYDAY. This is so important. Let me tell you a fun fact about the brain. The brain can’t tell the difference between reality and fiction. To put this differently, it can’t tell the difference between something you are thinking, and what’s actually happening. This is a great advantage for humans, because if we use this as a tool, we can improve any area in our lives. So I want you to look in the mirror in the morning and say “damn look at that ass”. Tell yourself that you are great, everyday. That you are smart, pretty, nice and funny! By complementing yourself, right now, you’ll start loving yourself for who you are in this moment, which will bring you such joy into your life.
- How do you speak to your best friend? When they put themselves down, how do you cheer them up? Maybe you tell them “oh don’t be so hard on yourself, you look stunning!”. I now want you to think about how you speak to yourself daily. Most people aren’t aware, but we speak to ourselves like we are trash. Today, I want you to watch your thoughts very closely, and write down what actually goes through your mind on a daily basis. What most people doesn’t know is that our own unhappiness are on us. We put ourselves down daily. So from today, I want you to be your own best friend. So the practice is to talk to yourself, like you would talk to your best friend, with love and kindness.
- Remember how I thought i’d first be happy if I grew my hair down to my bellybutton? This is exactly what most people are waiting for to be happy with themselves. “I’ll love myself when I get the perfect job, when I loose the weight, when I get that bag”. No my friend, it’s time to love yourself right now. Do you first love your friend, when he/she gets the perfect designer handbag? No. You love them right now. You should treat yourself the same way.
Do me a favor and go practice this for a week. I’d love to know how it went!